She deals with it by swimming.

Lap after lap in the cool early autumn evening, alone in the motel pool in her black one-piece suit with the straps that criss-cross in the back. After the tenth lap she holds her breath and sinks to the bottom, where little yellow lights cast rings of gold that ripple through the water. Submerged in water, she feels weightless and peaceful. This must be what it feels like to drown. But she can only hold herself there for a minute, and when she runs out of breath, she shoots through the water and breaks the surface like a trained dolphin.

(read on…)